For some the idea of responsibilities, commitment and growing up is terrifying and those memes going around Facebook saying ‘half my friends are engaged or having babies and the other half is too drunk to care’ unfortunately is very true!
I wanted to share my feelings and views on this topic because I feel like while I can still be immature and fun natured, I am a very grown up 21.
Unfortunately this post might be long and won’t include pictures so if you want to grab a cuppa and come back thats fine!
1. You Will Probably Need Your Parents More Than Ever
On average I will call my mom or dad at least twice a day even if it is just for a general chit chat or catch up, however I am mainly calling because I have a question that adults should know but I do not so I need my parents.
I also rely on my parents for advice when it comes to big things such as work, relationships, home life and especially now I don’t live at home I need their advice on a lot more than just ‘will I need a coat today?’. Of course I have my boyfriend for advice too but really there is nothing like a parents advice and comfort.
2. When You’re Ready You Will Know
This part goes for a lot of things; moving out, getting engaged, starting a family, saving for a mortgage, getting a pet… the list is endless and all of these things require major commitment which can be utterly terrifying for some people.
I absolutely cannot stand when someone says ‘no don’t do that your too young’ or anything along those lines. While I am only 21, I can make my own decision and I know myself, my mind and my body better than anyone else. I appreciate people think they have my best interests at heart however if I reach a point in my life when I am ready to start a family or commit to someone forever or whatever the case may be, then that is my decision (of course my boyfriend).
3. It’s Ok To Not Know What You’re Doing
When I moved out I realised that with freedom came responsibility and that scared the crap out of me, I am not usually one to shy away from responsibility but bills do strike a fear into my soul. I am such a forgetful person that if I didn’t have a Dad who sat me down and told me to create a budget on excel and make sure everything was set up through direct debit then I would probably break down once a week!
I think once you reach your 20’s people expect you to start your career and be on the path to success and know what your doing and where you are going… NO! just no.
Unfortunately this post might be long and won’t include pictures so if you want to grab a cuppa and come back thats fine!
1. You Will Probably Need Your Parents More Than Ever
On average I will call my mom or dad at least twice a day even if it is just for a general chit chat or catch up, however I am mainly calling because I have a question that adults should know but I do not so I need my parents.
I also rely on my parents for advice when it comes to big things such as work, relationships, home life and especially now I don’t live at home I need their advice on a lot more than just ‘will I need a coat today?’. Of course I have my boyfriend for advice too but really there is nothing like a parents advice and comfort.
2. When You’re Ready You Will Know
This part goes for a lot of things; moving out, getting engaged, starting a family, saving for a mortgage, getting a pet… the list is endless and all of these things require major commitment which can be utterly terrifying for some people.
I absolutely cannot stand when someone says ‘no don’t do that your too young’ or anything along those lines. While I am only 21, I can make my own decision and I know myself, my mind and my body better than anyone else. I appreciate people think they have my best interests at heart however if I reach a point in my life when I am ready to start a family or commit to someone forever or whatever the case may be, then that is my decision (of course my boyfriend).
3. It’s Ok To Not Know What You’re Doing
When I moved out I realised that with freedom came responsibility and that scared the crap out of me, I am not usually one to shy away from responsibility but bills do strike a fear into my soul. I am such a forgetful person that if I didn’t have a Dad who sat me down and told me to create a budget on excel and make sure everything was set up through direct debit then I would probably break down once a week!
I think once you reach your 20’s people expect you to start your career and be on the path to success and know what your doing and where you are going… NO! just no.
I graduated a few months ago and have a degree in Specialist Hair and Media Makeup, I work for DHL counting parts in a warehouse, I am not on my path to success and I have absolutely ZERO idea what I am doing with my life but at the same time I am so happy and living each day as it comes and enjoying time with my boyfriend and our millions of fur babies.
There are hundreds of success stories where the person hasn’t realised their calling in life until their 30’s, 40’s or even 50’s! I have no doubt in my mind that one day i’ll be on my path but right now I have no clue where I’m going and I’m Ok with that.
4. Everything Will Change
Your friends will change, your situation will change, your outlook on life will change… EVERYTHING changes and in my opinion everything happens for a reason but I still have a hard time embracing change don’t get me wrong!
For me my 20’s kicked off to an awful start as my ex of 3 years left so that was a massive change I had to deal with from the get go, my parents had just split up and I started seeing someone else (my current boyfriend) so while things where changing I was so preoccupied with a new guy and being wrapped up in the honeymoon phase I didn’t really process much of it. I moved in with my boyfriend, which was a great but scary change and then my Dad sold the house I grew up in for 10/11 years which was incredibly difficult… It seems like with every positive change, comes a negative one to balance the books but I always take the approach of dealing with a negative change the same way you deal with a positive one.
I have lost friends of nearly 17/18 years, I have drifted from family I was once inseparable with, I became responsible for a property, cleaning, feeding myself & my boyfriend, caring for pets that are mine and not my parents. The changes come thick and fast but they shape you into the person you will spend the rest of your life being.
5. You Can Still Have Fun
Everyones perception of fun is different. Me and my boyfriend have a group of friends that we go out with and its 3 couples, we are the youngest couple and the oldest is 10 years older than us but our idea of fun and theirs is the same, that doesn’t make us old and boring it just means that we aren’t into clubbing and partying and staying out late getting drunk and not remembering anything (no offence if that is your thing – enjoy yourself!).
If you want to party and travel then you do that, if you want to sit in your house and play video games until ridiculous hours in the morning then why the hell not, if you want to take a course or learn a language then que te diviertas or avoir du plaisir!
Your idea of fun is all that matters and don’t let anyone tell you that you are boring for not being their idea of fun. I personally love to sit in my house all weekend and not have to socialise with anyone, just binge watch telly and drink enough tea to sink a ship whilst not moving out of my PJ’s other than to take a shower and put fresh ones on.
On the odd occasion (maybe once a month) the friendship group/couples will arrange a night where we will go and have a meal at a different restaurant, have a couple of drink and a laugh but guaranteed we will be home before 11 and tucked up in bed by half past. You just concentrate on doing you.
I hope you didn’t mind me doing this post, I know its different but its something that has been playing on my mind lately with everyone making comments and judging me for the way I am spending my 20’s.
Have a great week! xoxo
I hope you didn’t mind me doing this post, I know its different but its something that has been playing on my mind lately with everyone making comments and judging me for the way I am spending my 20’s.
Have a great week! xoxo
